I think everyone needs some down time once in a while. A time when cell phones, computers, radio and TV need to be silenced. A little time to stop reflect and recharge. No matter how hard we try, life’s issues rise up to trip us and shake us. I know for me, it is never just one thing but it is always several issues that arise at the same time or in close secession.
I hit my “gotta have down-time” today. The saga continues on my venture to purchase replacement windows for my house with ongoing conflicts with the contractor. The experience continues to be unpleasant.
At work, an old case came back to life with a vengeance. I’m caught between conflicting corporate powers who disagree on the resolution. One of my supervisors has completely forgotten all the training and I have to return most of her work to be re-worked. She refuses to talk to me so I have no idea how to get her back on track. Her manager was offended by my manager so he will not speak to me. I guess the honeymoon is over at work and everyone is just acting angry and disrespectful.
I just had my 34th wedding anniversary for a marriage that only exists on paper. If I’m truthful, my grief is over something that never existed except in my imagination. I’m coming up on the anniversary of my suicide attempt that was actually almost successful but for the Grace of God. I’m nearing the anniversary of my mother’s death who I miss so very much. I can still hear her ask me if my siblings were coming to sit at her deathbed and my fumbling to make excuses for them.
I’m taking this downtown to recharge. This year, with God’s help I will not be taken down by depression, stress or life’s curve balls. I will stop and remember all that I have to be thankful about and how far I have progressed on a personal level. I will praise God for everything. I will hold on and know that this is not forever. Somehow I’m going to focus on what is really important.
Walking out of darkness Into the Light 